Do you know people that live on drama or stress? There are some folks that thrive on it! They always have something going on in their life that they must rant about. If they don’t have anything going on in theirs, they will create some, and sometimes they create it in yours.
There is a large amount of people that live this way, for a couple reasons.
One reason is the environment they grew up in and that is what they know. We’ve all heard that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. This is very true in how we interact with the world. If mom was a “drama queen” or dad was a workaholic or one of them complained all the time, chances are that the kids will turn out much the same.
Reason number two is that they need to create some excitement in their lives. It is not that they mean any harm, but they need some excitement (or stress) in their lives.
Let me explain. We all need a certain amount of stress in our lives to be productive, fulfilled and healthy. I am not saying that the extreme amount of stress some of us experience is healthy, but we do need a little.
If you think about your gifts that God gave you, the saying goes, “If you don’t use it, you lose it.” If we don’t exercise it, whatever that is, we lose the ability to use it. If you sit around on your couch or in bed, your muscles become weak and atrophy.
You must use resistance of some sort to build that muscle. That resistance is a form of stress.
If you do not exercise your brain, you’ll lose that capacity as well. It will atrophy. In a simple form, this is the inability to do long division without a calculator just 5 years after high school. The worst form is someone developing Alzheimer’s. Research proves that the more you exercise your brain and provide it adequate nourishment, the less likely your chances of developing this devastating disease.
Years ago I read a study that talked about how we as Americans sometimes create our own stress. In many other countries, they have to struggle to find clean water or edible food. They fight off animals, insects or other tribes. They have to worry about shelter and clothing, etc. We as Americans have to worry about none of that.
We have things to worry about, yes, but not life and death, not basic needs. We worry about where we are going to eat – at home, fast food, or a restaurant. We worry about missing our favorite TV show or who is going to win the championship. True that some of us have to worry about paying our bills, sick family members and some other major things that happen in life, but the majority of Americans will go to bed in a comfortable place, with food in our belly, and a roof over our heads.
This study talked about how we create our own drama or stress because we do not have those basic life or death needs to worry about.
Our body also reacts to stress by releasing adrenaline when we are exposed to stress or drama. It is exciting. We feel a rush of energy that we may rarely feel sitting at our desk at work.
There is a great many people in America that go through the motions each day. They wake up, get ready for work, go to work, come home, watch TV and go to bed. This is pretty much everything until the weekend when they get to sleep in, see some friends, spend some time with family and then dread going to work Monday morning when it starts all over again.
When I worked in corporate America in my twenties that was pretty much my routine. I always wanted something more, but didn’t know what or how to go after it. So I found myself hanging around people that were a little more drama queens than the people I choose to hang out with now. Back then, there was always some crisis, some drama or fight. It wears me out thinking of it now.
So, when I started my own business, I felt the rush of overwhelm – more adrenaline, much more. I found myself working insane amounts of hours and over-committing myself to no end. I know some folks that do this in their jobs. I got into this rut of always having to be productive and not being able to take down time. I had started thriving on that rush of drama/stress without realizing it.
I was working with a coach during this time and she asked me what would happen if I did nothing and sat around the house for a whole weekend. This idea was ludicrous to me. I had so much to do and no one else was going to do it (or so I thought). She mentioned that she believed I was thriving on adrenaline. I thought I was just really busy.
She gave me a challenge to do nothing for an entire weekend. “An entire weekend?! Are you crazy?!”- ran through my head. I decided I wanted to move forward so I agreed, although I don’t think I had fully bought into the idea.
Much to my surprise I became physically ill on Friday and Saturday. I guess my body decided I needed to see how this weekend off would really be. I laid in bed or on the couch for those two days, frustrated that not only was I doing nothing, but feeling miserable too. By Saturday night I was feeling better, but I didn’t do much. I may have eaten a little something and either read or watched movies.
By Sunday morning, I felt fine, but decided to finish out my weekend of doing nothing. Although I was tempted to do some work, even if it was just housework, I declined. I sat around and did nothing other than relax to the extreme. I was amazed at the peace I had received from that one weekend. That one weekend broke the cycle.
I cannot say that I have weekends where I sit around and do nothing the entire time, but now, I have no guilt around the down time I do take now. I have the ability to set boundaries in my schedule to provide adequate time with my husband, friends, and our dogs as well as business. I will say I still have a high achievement standard, but I have learned over the years to create peace in my day instead of thriving on the adrenaline of overwhelm.
Your stress may not be self-created like mine and so many others, but I promise that the only people that do not have some form of stress in their lives are lying 6 feet under.
So, how do we deal with the stress in a positive manner?
I have a few tips that now give me ultimate peace of mind. I hope they help you as well. Read the entire article here
About the Author: Jen Beck, RNC owner and founder of Advanced Wellness Coaching, LLC, is the master of making healthy living simple, easy and long term. She supports, coaches, and teaches thousands of men and women enrolled in her real health programs. Having come from a life of junk food, low energy and poor health herself, she empowers her clients to reclaim their life and vitality through her innovative programs in just a few months. She’s coached her private clients to release more than 80 pounds in just over 6 months, eliminate the need for acid reflux meds, anti-depressants and other meds in just weeks. Jen’s approach is empowering, compassionate, and guaranteed to deliver results. More About Jen: http://www.advancedwellnesscoaching.com/